I’ve gone from no emotion to emotion overload. I’m so overwhelmed by how many people have made donations to My JustGiving page. I cried for a good hour earlier today about how much love people have. There are people making donations that I’ve never even met, who claim that I’m inspiring. And I can tell you I don’t feel that way! But they’ve actually inspired me. Anyways I can’t cry again today!
It’s not lost on me that I’m very fortunate to be so well looked after by so many amazing people. My stomach has been really bothering me so I just lay on my bed for an hour this afternoon and was listening to my nanny play with Evie and my cleaner was doing some laundry. Who ever thought I’d be able to say that!! lol It’s not something I’m used to. It’s very hard for me to just let go and let others help even when I’m in good need of it. I promise I’m working on it though! It’s hard to just lay back but I bet I’ll get used to it quickly.
Elliott is out of town for work right now and at night it’s just me and Evie, which has been fine actually. I love taking care of my girl and because I get the help during the days then it doesn’t seem that tiring now. But I really miss Ell. For awhile there everytime he went out of town something bad happened. First my miscarriage, then my lovely Grandma Mabel. Even when I found out about the cancer it was the one day all week he was at a meeting in London. I get a bit anxious without him. It’s so strange that we’ve had to deal with cancer and not even been married two years, but I have to say we are more in love now then we have ever been. Somehow we are really happy right now and really aware of how much love we have for each other and for Evie. We feel grateful for each day that we get to see her grow and that we can be together. I don’t know what I’d ever do without Elliott. He’s simply the best.
Feeling: In love
Loss of appetite